Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Can Store Hair Relaxers After Opened

Westphalia eyebrows


other day I read in the newspaper about a really oblique case in a small village somewhere in the depths of Westphalia. It was about love, sex and passion, not what one would expect in Westphalia, and in order Pancakes, safe cracker and a very old carpet, in which an unfortunate husband has made a rather involuntary journey.

But first things first. So I read some of Justine, an average housewife in an average house with average children, an average garden and an exceptionally well-functioning marriage. To Franz-Otto enters her life.

Since it's over with Justine's mediocrity, and so inflamed for Franz-Otto, that it is ready to leave everything and to elope with him. Franz-Otto, a friend of the family feels, not much less for Justine, but there is Eugene, Justine's husband, Franz-Otto's friend. And who is stupid enough to average conservative values: a distinctive came to him out of the question.

Justine, now out of sheer delight all your senses, forging a diabolical plan: It wants to poison her husband. So she decides to make Eugene a joy to him and prepare his favorite meal: pancakes. However, this pancake has it all: a strong sedative to blow out the life of Eugene candles.

But Eugene is much tougher than Justine would have thought possible: The massive, more than 100-pound steel workers is just a little sleepy from the pancakes, which can be downright despair Justine. Perplexed, they notified her lover Franz-Otto. As luck would have it, the look in after the meal and invites Eugene to take a ride. Eugene Mafioso would have been here had to be put off alarm bells, but Eugene is Westphalian, and so a drive through the beautiful Rhine Westphalia after a fat meal ... has something.

From the beautiful West Eugene looks Fallen but not much: In a quiet corner him shoot his friend Franz-Otto. Since the do not really know where to disappear the body, he rolls them in an old carpet and stowed them in the van of a friend. The next day he wants to Eugene then disappear quietly.

When Franz-Otto visits the van the next morning, he is almost a stroke: The box is gone. What brings us to a gang of Romanian Beagle Boys, the carriage drawn with the van a few days over the place, not knowing that is wrapped in the old carpet of dead Eugen.

rise in the neighboring village of thieves to steal the local post, the vault, and slide it into a solitary sport home to weld on it there in peace. The transporter along with carpet and body left behind.

For the local police found the van and the welded-Safe, a clear thing: Burglary with a stolen car. So make sure car and down into the weekend: the crime scene the rest done on Monday, of course. Stress eating a yes else.

Justine, however, her husband reported as missing, and promptly gets a phone call Monday morning. Her husband has appeared, unfortunately, no longer alive ... rolled in a carpet ... found in a van ... in the police garage.

Eugene finally buried properly. But this time is not the police come for the weekend and the couple quickly on the ropes: Franz-Otto keeps the pressure does not stand and confesses. And Justine same time. Rumour Franz-Otto's eyebrows have brought the detectives on the trail. He had his Opel, in which he had shot and killed Eugene, set on fire to cover up evidence. And a bit of been close to it.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Vertical Blind Headrail Sales

Erik the pleasure


No idea what made me take notice. I mean, we are honest: Who has taken a bum? Although he always sits in the same place. And usually I back out and no money, because I thought he might as well do something for his money, rather than simply stop the obvious: bad singing, for example. Or play bad triangle. Ventriloquists or bad.

What was different that morning ...? Perhaps the strumming of a very small change in my pocket. The fingers on my nerves this smell like dirty metal, and you can buy them anything. I once thought about it, so to feed the ducks and art call, but the concept was not well received by the public. Otherwise, every fucking find innovative, but retractable times a fat duck ... because what is happening!

Anyway, I gave him my tiny small change given. Against my principles. Just like that. And he says: "Thank you, Andrew."
And I say, "All right, man"

While I go on, it works in me. Do you know the second, just before you get to a cause? So, as if one looks behind his jam sandwich, which is a just fallen out of hand. Then it makes Flatsch and you know it: why does the name mean? So I go back and ask him.
He answers: "We 're friends. "
" We are friends? Since when is that? "
" In a few days we will be friends. "
" Aha. And how do you know then now my name? "
" Because you do to me will think the same. "
" Why would I do that? "
" You ask me? "

There are conversations that lead to nowhere. And above all, they mean that you miss his bus. And this, in turn, that zurücklatscht pissed and complained to him that has a bus can be missed. But before I can anpflaumen him, he says, "You've missed the bus, I know."
"Yes, but that's not the point ..."
"the 105s, right?"
"Yes, but that's not the point ... how do you know "
He stands up and gives me his hand:".. Hi, I'm Erik, the time travelers "
" Andrew, hello "
Erik nods, grinning, and I notice that I have him just presented . Just as he predicted.

Erik and I were actually friends in the coming weeks. I brought red wine - and not cheap, as Erik was able to distinguish bad from good red wine very good, after all, he had many years of red wine production in the seventeenth, eighteenth and accompanies the nineteenth century. What it did not stop to put a Grand Cru of the neck and runterzukippen him like bubble. He did amazing things to report, less than what anyone could look up the history book, but about what just was not in the history book and are there never would. Did you know for example that Napoleon wore women's underwear? So, I do not.
"And that's really true? With the Napoleon? "
" Of course this is true. "
" And what is with the other ... Stalin, for example? "
" the well. "
" What? The too? "
" If I you say. "
" And ... Catherine the Great? "
" The also wore women's underwear. "
" No, I do not mean. They say things to her. With men. And a horse ... "
" No, no horse. Since only once a Siberian captain was there, everyone called the horse, if you know what I mean ... "

I understand. And was sure to never be able to take a history book in hand, without manifesting images in my head, which made every historical event into a collection of perverts and Travestiten. Nevertheless, his stories were amusing, and if he will not remember something, he concluded his eyes briefly slumped, a piece of collapses and suddenly appeared again.
"Well, I was again there," he said then, "and I assure you. Michelangelo eyed"? "You met him"

"What do you mean made? I gave him two years assisted "
I cried." You were just ten seconds off "
He replied calmly:" If I had you here now will have to wait two years "

This went on all the time between? us. Now and then he plunged, he was back and knew everything about galley slavery, Roman trade, Greek architecture, Middle High German Love songs or modern colonialism. And because I served him continue to fine red wine, and he persuaded to use glasses, we both gave off a strange sight: a bum and a nine times Kluger, the red drink made of expensive glass and - sitting on a house wall - in conversation.

That could have go on forever, because the conversations with Erik, the Voyagers gave my day structure and let me go home always smiling. Then, suddenly, I had a great idea, in hindsight, the most stupid was that I have ever come.
"Tell me the lottery numbers of times but next week," I asked him.
He shook his head: "I can not travel into the future. Only in the past. "
I scratched my chin. "If you are in the past, you have but also in the future, to come back?"
Erik shook his head: "No, I must in the present. Not in the future. "
" Wait, "I cried. "When we first met, you told me we were already friends ... So: Future
Again he shook his head. "? Just because you think the here and now for the present"
"Are we not in the present"
"no. But we are also not far from "
I was thinking. If we were not in the present, then we were in the past. I thought were the present. And the rest of humanity as well. That was once a novelty! And a practical one at that. Can be likened to assess whether a business lunch or a date for an order to a liaison led or a football game was worth the entrance fee. Or if your numbers were on the lottery ticket the right ones.
"you can not make an exception? ? Please me "
Erik hesitated," Because you are my friend "
Yes
" Your life will change quite ... "I shrugged
?. his shoulders. "Then I arrive let"
He hesitated a moment, then said: "I can not tell you the numbers from next week.

What he meant was, it hit me until a week later when I read the headlines in the newspaper read: no lottery numbers. The mixing machine had failed. For the first time ever. I walked to his seat, but he was no longer there. And not even the next day. Or on the next. I fear he will not return. I miss our talks and the sloping red wine on the street. It has made my life so colorful - now it's gray again. Everything has changed. Just as he had predicted.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Star Wars, Waffle Mold

Last Exit: olet garage


Recently I had lunch with my friend, Salvatore, and when she went to the figures, he invited me to a languid gesture and paid the bill with a hundred. The rest he left the pretty operation as a tip: 37,30 €. I was quite stunned, because Salvatore is a nice guy, but he is generally so fuel efficient that it plays a joker in Wikipedia under "famous skinflint" immortalized. It's not the famous.

It went on cheerfully: cocktail, cigar, trendy bar. All at his own expense. What he intended it, I did not know but that he intended something by it, seemed more than obvious. What was there to celebrate? A new love? A new life? Schalalala? I was silent when I burst and with curiosity. For Salvatore was usually not just a tightwad, but also secretive. In his case, this meant that he himself came out with things or not.

So I waited.

some point he said: "You ask yourself sure what's wrong with me?" I shrugged
hypocritical his shoulders: "Yes. Is something going on "
" I have a new job "
" What "He hesitated
" for a job?.? It's complicated ... "
" Aha.

was honest, all somehow complicated by Salvatore. As an administrative official in the Building Department, he had to handle a lot of powerful complex operations. There was the sophisticated coffee machine, the complex folder that complicated desk, and the complicated relationship with Miss Schmidt, as a writing pad, the only sex, sex, sex wanted. Sex, of course, complicated.

"You no longer working in the office?" I asked in amazement.
He replied. "But"
"Have you said not just that you had a new job"
"Yes."
? "And yet another to"
"If you so will: yes "
" if you will "
" It's complicated, "

Then he paid up and pushed me outside.?.. What he had to tell me he could do in the car.
"You have a car?" I asked in surprise. Because cars were for him the epitome of money. So far, anyway.
He nodded: "Yes ... over there ... "
I looked over and saw a Ferrari.
"You mean since the Reds?"
"Yes."

We took off and drove through seemingly aimlessly through the city. Reluctantly, he started telling me about his relatives who had really a good idea because would have if something morally questionable, but still a good idea. But where funerals were so damn expensive now. Meanwhile, we already had to save his life, only to be again placed neatly under the earth. That was really a scandal. I did not understand a word. We stopped at a tall building in a development area.

"Grandpa Federico," said Salvatore, as if everything would be explained. "You know. Lieblingsopa my"
"He is dead but the last few years,"
"of which I speak it."
"What?"
"From dying. And the high costs. Do you hear me not to because "
" But ... it's just ... . Complicated, "
He shook his head:" So now again not complicated ... Look there! "

I looked out the side window on the exit to the parking garage. It was a very nice exit to a parking garage. Anyway, I said that Salvatore.
"Rubbish!" Hissed Salvatore. "Now! Look!
Someone just left the garage and behind him rattled the door shut again. Now I could read it: Arrivederci Federico. As graffiti.
"Very nice," I nodded, "but ..."
"Grandpa is there."
For a moment I thought he had heard correctly. How: ?.? As "
" On foundations "
" Excuse me "
Salvatore shrugged his shoulders:" Do you know how much a German funeral? We would have gone all broke. And now look at this: Is not it beautiful? We have hired the best graffiti artists. And now we greet grandpa every time one drives to work. Now admit it: but what has the "

We drove on, while I was feverishly whether Salvatore took me straight to the arm or not?. He worked in the construction office, knew of any sites that existed in the city. And he was stingy to not work anymore. Had he done that!
"The Most are enthusiastic about the matter, "he said.
"Most?"
"Thus says what got around fast, you know?"
"In other words, you ... you still have more people buried? "
" Well, is all built out. ! Look, "
We drove to a bridge where the pillars stood: Wilhelm Bungert is the greatest. Clearly of the same graffiti sprayers.
"You can choose your inscription before. Can have it all. From simple lettering to the Graffiti Deluxe. We bring each for 299 € in the earth. With a chic graffiti for 399 €. Da! "
We passed a shopping center. Click to read: I love Mary. Ulla and Deniz. Herbert was here. Nobody is perfect, Ralfi. It was unbelievable how I discovered a lot of graffiti. I was never noticed.

"And if the way power of one?" I asked.
"Then we make them turn back. been transferred part of the service. "
" And why are you telling me all this? "
" You're just to Berlin? "
" So what? "
" In Berlin, a lot of construction. "
" I'm planners, Salvatore. . Not undertaker "
Salvatore sighed:" Think about it to you. I get just as purely a busload of pensioners from the Sauerland. Were never been to Berlin. "

I was silent a moment. Was left off the irreverent part of the company, it was actually pretty damn where you were. And that church and state had a monopoly on the last of all trips, would in principle once an application with the Cartel value. Why could the Ferrari driving and not me? In a figurative sense, I mean.

"I think about it, okay?"
Salvatore nodded.
We passed the new tax office. It read: Mark Grossman steals at Aldi.
? "And did you not afraid that you display a"
Salvatore shrugged his shoulders: "And what happened then? They tear the tax office off to check the foundation, according to Mark Grossman? "
" If the stolen really at Aldi? "
" No idea. His old man has not paid "